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Straight Angle™
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Thursday, October 29, 2009Some scribbles saved somewhere sometime...தொலைத்த நிழலை திரியில் தேடும் விட்டிற்பூச்சி நான், அணைந்த திரியின் நிழல் நீ.. குவளைச்சருகில் சுகந்தம் நாடும் தேன்வண்டு நான், சுகந்தம் மறந்த காகிதப் பூ நீ.. பாதை மறந்து, பயனைத் துறந்த மானுடன் நான், பயனற்ற பாதை மாறா கலம் நீ. Sunday, July 08, 2007Patti!இனி யார் முகச்சுருக்கங்கலை நான் நையாண்டி செய்வது? யார் மடியில் தலை சாய்த்து தலை கோதும் விரலை தள்ளுவது? யாரின் "சாப்டியாடா கண்ணா?" என்ற கேள்விக்கு பதில் சொல்வது? யாருடன் இனி நான் "இவள் தான் எனது கேர்ள் ஃப்ரண்டு" என வம்புரைப்பது? யாரை காலை "மடி" கலைப்பேன் என்று அழ விடுவது? யாரிடம் பவிழமல்லி மலரை பறிக்க போட்டியிடுவது? யாரிடம் நிலாச்சோறு ஊட்டச் சொல்லி மல்லுக்கு நிற்பது? அன்று நீ சொன்னாய்- "சீக்கரம் நா போறதுக்குல்ல கல்யாணம் பண்ணிக்கோடா" நான் சொன்னேன் -"எதற்கு அவசரம் உனக்கு? "அவன்" என்ன ஓட்டப் பந்தயமா வெச்சுருக்கான் - முதல் பரிசு பெற?" இன்று- முதல் பரிசு உனக்கு- சிரிக்க முடிய வில்லை என்னால்!! You will be sorely missed- Patti!! I love you. Sunday, June 10, 2007Why we do What we do?Couple of days back, I was reading through something, when I hit upon this piece of post by Emanuel Derman. I follow his posts regularly and I find this post of his, informative and pretty interesting. I am just reproducing his words: Doug Hofstadter's book about Godel's theorem, "I am a Strange Loop", points out that mathematicians before after Hilbert and Russell and Whitehead thought that in axiomatic systems, (a) if you could prove it, it must be true, and (b) everything true could be proved. Godel threw a monkey wrench into (b). There's a similar set of assumptions people often make about human beings: (a) If you can persuade someone of the logic of something, they should experience the same feeling as you about it; and (b) if people experience some feeling, there must be a logical cause. But this too breaks down in various ways. In my case, take global warming as an example of the falseness of (a): it's logical that I should be anxious to do something about it, but the logic doesn't really move me enough. I could try to explain why, but, in the end, that's how I feel. It's a version of Schopenhauer's "You can do what you want but you can't want what you want." I might want to be a person that wants to do something about global warming, but I can't be that person. That said, a long time ago I was friendly with a philosopher/physicist who told me in all serious that he wanted to be a person that liked classical music, and he could really make himself into that kind of person. I never knew whether to believe him. (b) is more difficult. There probably is a cause for most feelings or reactions, depending on what kind of cause you like -- Freud, Darwin or some neuroscientist stuff. But on the other hand, who cares: I like licorice: why? God knows and no-one cares. And why justify it? I thought of this when some telemarketer called to get me to donate money to some charity. I told her not to bother me at home. She tried to explain to me the virtue of the charity. I said I didn't want her to call me. She kept asking me WHY I wouldn't give money for something good? She wanted an explanation and I was tempted to give her one. But when I asked her why she had to call me, she said I was on her "list" and that was that. She didn't need any justification, though she wanted me to justify not giving. There's an old Lou Reed song called "Doin the things that we want to," and she knew how to do it.There are more than a couple of inferences for me from those words. I particularly agree with these words : There probably is a cause for most feelings or reactions, depending on what kind of cause you like -- Freud, Darwin or some neuroscientist stuff. But on the other hand, who cares: I like licorice: why? God knows and no-one cares. And why justify it? This justification is something that I have already discussed so many times. There can hardly be no reason (cause) for something that I feel or do, but why should I justify it and to whom? The do/like something intrinsically and there is no need to justify it. With Justification comes guilt- in my opinion, you don't justify unless you feel guilty about doing something- you don't justify the breath you take, the food you eat - but you tend to justify some exorbitant money you just lost gambling or the wrong way you took when you didn't know which way to go! To me, Justifying something is an upfront acceptance of the guilt that I harbor and the moral smallness that I feel because of that, towards the person that I am justifying my actions. I don't think I need to justify my actions/feelings etc to anyone unless I really want apologies and/or acceptance. Expecting acceptance in itself is something that seems to me as repugnant. But then I realize we do it all time- every time. Seems unsurmountable to me. May be thats why we do what we do! Friday, February 23, 2007Nuthing Much!How many months had it been now..that I had seen you? I remember it...Its exactly 3 months and 2 days now...Isn't it enough time for someone to forget? But how can I? I see you in the digital Screen, in the late night sleep, in the frost of the day, in the freezing fingers. While at night, standing on the balcony and starring at the almost spotless sky, I can imagine what would you say for this. May be I know you so much? May be you are all that I had thought you were? The adorable kid on my desktop solicits inquisitive questions and a muted, understood smile. That smile is a sign of playing along with the lie that I live through- just as the same lie you are living too. Isn't it hard not to look at that kid and smile to oneself- saying this is what I am missing? It is hard..mighty hard. Every morning as I wake up and switch ON the comp, the smile, those twisted lips, those carefree childish face- that fleeting moment is what I look forward for, in a day. The last week, when this monitor wouldn't work and the laptop had to go for a service- there isn't something that I had missed so much as that face that wakes me up every day. It's the feeling of getting back something that left you- words can't explain them. Jus been Free Counter Get awesome blog templates like this one from BlogSkins.com © All that is written here are the Genuine Products of the Intellect of the author and are protected by the relevant copyright acts...If you wish to quote the highness you can do so at your own risk and at risk to the integrity of the author's cerebrum.
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